Saturday, January 25, 2014


By: Prof. Mohamud Siad Togane

An Islamic regime must be serious in every field.
There are no jokes in Islam.
There is no humor in Islam.
There is no fun in Islam.
                                          . . . Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini

But Jesus said
Let the little children come to me
And forbid them not
For of such is the kingdom of heaven.
. . . Jesus

Watching them, Jesus laughs.
 “Why are you laughing at us?”
 The nettled disciples ask,
And Jesus says that he is laughing not at them
But at their strange idea of pleasing their God.
. . . Jesus

Jesus, we learn, was laughing at the disciples’ prayer
Because it was directed at their God
The Old Testament God
Who is really no friend of mankind
But, rather, the cause of its suffering.
. . . Jesus

The Imams of Montreal summoned me
To their Kangaroo court
On St Laurent
In the Red Light District

And threw their holy book at me
And threw
The Montreal Gazette

Pointing to

What they did not like
What they did not approve of
What drove them pious babbling blind

A photo of me
Suited up in a
Santa Claus Suit
With a child on my lap
Whispering his secret wish in my ear

They yelled at me

Imagine if you can
 A Black Somali Santa
Like you

What a blasphemy!
What a disgrace to the Muslim Canadian Community
What are you?

Are you a Muslim?
Are you a Christian?
Are you a Godless Jew!

What is your religion?
I laughed
I did not want
To give them the pleasure of weeping

I knew
It was no laughing matter
A week before this extraordinary incident
I remembered them putting out
A fatuous fatwa

Condemning to hell all Moslems
Who had the Grace to wish Canadian Christians
Merry Christmas!

They intoned unctuously
What you have done
Grievous sin
A mortal sin

Tell us right now

What are you?
Are you a Muslim?
Are you a Christian?
Are you a Godless Jew?

What is your religion?

I answered

Anything that brings a Smile to a child’s face
Anything that brings Peace to a child’s face
Anything that brings Joy to a child’s face

Anything that is Fun
Anything that is Funny
Anything that leads this world

Out of its Deep Doodoo
Out of its Deep Darkness
Out of Lucifer’s Laocoön

Into the Lord’s Light of Laughter

That is my religion

And then everything went quiet
As quiet as when the Good Lord doodled on the ground
And shamed the Pharisees
And looked up
And said

 Where are those thine accusers?
Hath no man condemned thee?

No comments: